This Sleepy Hollow episode, “Dead Men Tell No Tales,” was Part 2 of a Bones-Sleepy Hollow crossover, and frankly, the second half of the crossover, the actually Sleepy Hollow episode, was better to me than the Bones portion. First of all, I’ve never been a fan of Bones, and after watching this crossover, my feelings on the show have been hardened. Temperance is a pill. As my sister said, she was that kid in class that would always correct the teacher (or anyone), saying, “Well, actually…”. That “dis bi***” face that Ichabod made after he tried to explain the emotional side to love and life was exactly how I felt. Moving on. 

The overall mystery was okay. It seemed like Team Witness solved the case pretty quickly, but I did like that it involved zombies on Halloween. Pandora raised General Howe, the same Howe that wanted Ichabod to recant his involvement in the War for Independence, and made him the general of his own zombie army. But of course, with the help of Team Jeffersonian, Team Witness were able to stop the army and get General Howe to go, “You don’t get to kill me, Ichabod!” before he stepped into the blue fires and ignited himself back to the afterlife.

Yes, the way Team Witness defeated General Howe was from mysterious blue “pre-Hellenic” Greek blue fire. To be honest, I didn’t actually hear how the blue fire was discovered to be the killer of the zombies, but it had something to do with a flashback to Ichabod’s time with Betsy Ross. This is, by the way, another instance in which I thought Betsy was overused. The show was already packed with characters; did we need Betsy, who added nothing to the episode? IDK. All I know is that I forgot all about her until I saw her.

The show was already packed with characters; did we need Betsy, who added nothing to the episode? #SleepyHolla Click To Tweet

Another problematic person (for those about that shipping life) is Zoe Corinth. Look, Zoe is fine. Like I said, she’s New Caroline. But I don’t think Old Caroline would have a creepy Instagram filled with her stalker images of Ichabod with “Craneonthebrain” used as a watermark. If I was Ichabod, and the girl I liked asked me to go to her Instagram to see her creepy lustful images of me, I’d quickly make myself ghost from her presence. Zoe just might be on this side of clingy, and I don’t think it was wise of Abbie to push Ichabod over to her. I get that Abbie wants Ichabod to finally close the Katrina Chapter (a chapter which still has impossible reasoning for her being a “good person”), and Zoe seems like a quirky Caroline-type girl on the outside, but if Abbie saw that “Craneonthebrain” Instagram, she’d quickly tell him to work on closing the Katrina Chapter by asking another woman out.

One viewer has this theory about Zoe:

There are other fans out there who believe this same theory, and I think they might be right. Zoe shouldn’t have known about Abbie’s joke of “Crane on the brain,” and what with her and Caroline’s same shared obsession with the 18th century and same quirky, mousy demeanor, it could be that Zoe is a figment of Pandora’s magic. One clue that could make this theory fact is Zoe’s name itself. The names “Zoe” and “Corinth” are both Greek names, and we know how big Pandora is on the history of ancient Greece, Sumer, and Assyria, all areas that interacted with each other. “Zoe” means “life,” the eternal life of God, and according to Behind the Name, “was adopted by Hellenized Jews as a translation for Eve.” Corinth is a current part of Greece, but it was also an ancient Grecian metropolis, known for its temple prostitutes. The luxurious nature of Corinth gave way to people using it as slang for people who are indulgent and give into pleasures and vices. From my quick research, I think “Zoe Corinth” is surprisingly blatant way of proclaiming that if Ichabod gives into his “vice” at the moment (of being needy, wanting to drown guilt in a relationship, wanting to act on lust or something of that nature), then his current ordained life as a Witness will be in jeopardy. He has a “zoe” life already in the sense that he’s following God’s path for him as a Witness. If he gives into this Zoe in female form, then he could put the whole world at risk.

ALSO READ:  The Irrational Episode 11 Finale Recap
It could be that Zoe is a figment of Pandora's magic. #SleepyHolla Click To Tweet

Similarly, Abbie and Jenny’s dad might be a temptation as well. Abbie’s dad is real, I’m sure, but the ideas of him welcoming both Abbie and Jenny back with open arms are temptations Abbie will have to deal with. Basically, she might have to come to terms with the fact that welcoming their father back might not be an option; sadly, he might want to have nothing to do with them. Or, he might be too scared of them and what they’re capable of in a supernatural sense to want to welcome them back into his life. Or he could be trying to protect them from himself because of his own supernatural problems. Either way, Abbie’s temptation of getting her father back might be the “Ichabod killing his wife” of this season as in it’ll be something that’ll tear her up on a soul level.

To get back to the subject of annoying characters, let me get back to Temperance “Bones” Brennan. She is like Sherlock, I guess, in the way that she’s completely exact about everything. But I just didn’t find her endearing. Perhaps I should watch more Bones episodes to get more into her character, but the entire Bones half of the night was just boring to me. I kept up with it on Twitter, as I was watching (and listening to some hilarious stories from my family members about their work days) and I got confirmation that there was a lot of extreme paralleling of Booth and Abbie and Temperance and Ichabod. Were Ichabod and Temperance supposed to be more alike or something in the Bones episode? Because Ichabod seemed to hate her during the Sleepy Hollow episode. Also confirmed was the amount of “I knew Corbin” talk Booth did with Abbie. Frankly, I thought they worked together the best in both the Bones and Sleepy Hollow hours. They would make great partners and, if Booth weren’t already in a relationship, I’d start shipping them #Boothabbie right now. Apparently, Team Jeffersonian was also about that #Ichabbie life. But the Bones hour as a whole was just a big sigh to me. The characters, apart from Booth, just don’t compel me enough. The  cadavers were pretty gross, though. Both episodes had their fair share of maggots, which I could have done without, since I was eating my dinner at the time. Back to the Sleepy Hollow hour.

ALSO READ:  Why Shonda Rhimes Keeps The Mondriches On 'Bridgerton': A Critique Of Shondaland's Representation Of Blackness In Romance
If Booth weren't already in a relationship, I'd start shipping them #Boothabbie right now. #SleepyHolla Click To Tweet

It seemed like we were going to get more Danabbie this episode…until Daniel figured out that Jenny and Joe are tracking the same thief woman Daniel’s been tracking. Apparently, that woman’s a part of a terrorist group buying artifacts. Now Daniel wants answers, and he wants them now. Jenny and Joe are now probably going to get a visit from the FBI, and Abbie’s job is going to be in danger unless Abbie can think of a legitimate reason her sister will be in the same area as an federal criminal.

Jenny and Joe are becoming quite the team. I still can’t tell what their relationship is like. I’m going to keep it at sister-brotherly for now, since that’s how I’d like to think of them. I mean, Corbin raised both of them, after all. But I can’t tell if that’s how the show is going to go. It seems like they want to be in a middle ground, since they aren’t actually related. We’ll keep a pin in this dynamic.

Finally, Pandora’s plan is…what? I mean, I’m sure there is a plan, since she’s still growing her evil tree. But it’s nearly fully bloomed, and Pandora’s showing more and more of her true snake-like self. So what’s the endgame? The theory has already been put out that Pandora is the snake from Genesis. “But the snake was Satan!” I know, Bible-reader, I know. But Pandora’s a snake too, and she’s got a tree. And she’s terrorizing a man and a woman who are destined to be involved in each other’s lives. And that man and woman are called the “destroyers.” Perhaps the “destroyers” of Paradise? Or just the Destroyers of Pandora and her evilness? Either way, Pandora’s an evil snake terrorizing a couple.

This makes me go back to Zoe Corinth. If Zoe is just a projection of Pandora as well as a temptation for Ichabod, did Abbie unknowingly play into Pandora’s plan to keep them separated by cajoling Ichabod on to ask Zoe out? Did the Witnesses learn nothing from last  year about what happens when they separate? How soon did we see Zoe in relation to when Pandora started growing her evil tree? I’m sure we’ll find out the answers to this stuff soon enough.

What did you think of this week’s episode? Leave your comments below!

If you loved this (or you know someone who will), share it! If you really loved it, subscribe in the sidebar to be alerted to more posts like this.

SLEEPY HOLLOW: L-R: Tom Mison and Nicole Beharie, guest stars Emily Deschanel and David Boreanaz of BONES in the special “Dead Men Tell No Tales” SLEEPY HOLLOW / BONES crossover episode of SLEEPY HOLLOW airing Thursday, Oct. 29 (9:00-10:00PM ET/PT) on FOX. ©2015 Fox Broadcasting Co. Cr: Tina Rowden/FOX.
Please follow and like us:

The Next Omar Sharif: Why Finding the Next Middle Eastern Hollywood Star is Easier Than We Think

This article has been a long time in the making, mostly because it’s hard for one person who has several jobs out outside of maintaining a site to keep with and write articles about...

The Three Times Leonard Nimoy's Spock Helped Reduce the Race Relations Gap

Leonard Nimoy is dead. WHY!? I feel like the stereotypical woman who throws herself over the casket asking, “WHY, GOD! WHY!” But, as much as I feel like that woman who’s still holding on, this...

Why Salim and The Jinn’s story is the heart of “American Gods”

I’ll say up front that I am an American Gods virgin. I’ve never read the book, so I went into this entire season blind. Heck, I still don’t know exactly what I witnessed in my three-episode...